Sunday, September 10, 2006

For My Dog

*I'll refer to him as mine, but really he's a family dog*

We got him just after my brother was born, which would make him about 16 now. I remember when we went to the pet shop and the lady let him out of the cage and he ran around like crazy, I was so scared that he was going to escape and run out into the shopping centre, but they stopped him and we took him home.
He had black black fur and he was so cute, we wanted to name him Tex or something like that because he was so dark (Tex = Texas = oil = black) but my dad decided his name was D'fer (D'fer Dog, D for Dog..... my father is a master of wit) and we all thought it was really dumb.

He would always take my brothers dummies and have them in his mouth like my brother did, it was really cute and for years after we would find the plastic bits all around the back yard.
Once when he was about 2 or 3 he ran under the car just as my mum was driving away and just clipped his tail. We went to my grandparents while my parents took him to the vet and I was thinking the whole night 'They wouldn't take his tail, he'll be fine', but they did and I thought (and still kind of do) that it was some sort of cosmic joke that they did that - that because I didn't want it to happen so bad they did it anyway just to spite me.

Then when I got my cat ( a whole other blog which I don't want to think about) he used to always get inside and steal his food, and I was so mad at him because my cat was my baby and he was a smelly dog (which is how I think my cat looked at him too).

And today I went into the backyard to hang out some washing and I thought he was rolling on the grass, but when I called him he didn't stop and he was having a fit. I called my mum and when I got back outside he was just twitching a little bit, I didn't want to go near him but I thought that if he's dying he shouldn't be alone, so I patted him and he was trying to walk somewhere but he couldn't see and just kept walking into things. I tried to hold him still but he wanted to move around, he got stuck beside the garage and he was yelping a bit, he must have been so scared, not knowing where you are or whats happening or what is in front of you. My mum rescued him and we wrapped him in a towel and took him to the vet.
We could have given him some drugs but it was an inevitability. My mum didn't know what to do, and I had to decide that we should put him down - which is now the second pets death i feel responsible for.

We got home and my dad was already digging a hole in the back yard, for some reason I can't face them being buried, so I don't know what happened next.
Our other dog Molly looks so miserable now, she's staying at the other side of the house.

I'm so sorry, but I think it was for the best and you're in a better place now. I will miss you.

This may seem a bit excessive to some people, for a dog, but I don't care.

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